When Homosexuality Hits Home by Joe Dallas

Author:Joe Dallas
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780736962063
Publisher: Harvest House Publishers, Inc.

The Spouse in Rebellion

He is, as the word rebellion suggests, unwilling to abandon the sin he has brought into the marriage. So when it’s discovered, he’ll defend it, protect it, or blame you for it.

Having been found out, he may tell you that he’s glad, because he needs to finally accept who he really is. He may have already read materials telling him homosexuality is inborn, normal, even ordained by God. Then, armed with this information, he sees himself as an innocent victim of a homophobic church and society. He married (he says) innocently believing that was the thing to do. But now, after trying to be a husband, he cannot and should not deny his true feelings. So he’ll yield to them, allowing you to find another partner, because he cannot go back to denying himself.

By now he may have withdrawn from your church or his old Christian friends, knowing they’ll never go along with this line of thinking. In fact he may have developed a whole new set of allies who encouraged him to come out and who’ll reinforce his new prohomosexual beliefs. He may express real anger at the church (some justified, some exaggerated) and minimize the basics of the faith, choosing instead a doctrine of self-fulfillment and self-gratification.

Your lesbian wife may also be angry with you, and as always there may be good reason. But with the anger may also come an unfair amount of blame. She may blame you entirely for the state of the marriage or her ungodly behavior or even her decision to marry you in the first place. (It’s amazing, really, how a person in rebellion can find evidence of guilt in everyone else.) And while it’s true you’ve been less than perfect and might indeed have a lot to repent of, you can never be blamed for another person’s willful and disruptive sin.

Overriding all of this, in the case of a rebellious spouse one fact will become tragically clear: Your partner will not take responsibility for his or her behavior and has no intention of giving it up.

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